On Third Thoughts... Most of my regular readers will know my mixture of feelings about ministry here in MLPK. About the factors I cannot change, some of which I need to let drop and leave in God's care, and the ones I wouldn't want to change. I'm exhausted after a very busy two weeks. The sort of satisfied exhaustion that comes from knowing you've been doing the right thing.

I don't know how busy most of my clerical readers are, but for me four weddings (in three different churches - with rehearsals), two mid-week services (in two different venues), one baptism and one funeral (in a cemetary I'd never visited before), plus two 8am Communions out of parish constitute a busy fortnight - especially when my "home fixtures", for lack of a better phrase, are done using church in a box (or from two suitcases to be correct).

Add into the equation (if I haven't mentioned it already) the car breaking down on the way to the funeral (having already put on my cassock for lack of knowledge of the cemetary) and arriving in an AA van, and I think it's fair to say it's been a rather eventful few days!

The point is that now the Christian Fellowship here have actually got their minister, and being suitably refreshed by a round of out of area activities, I'm far less fussed about getting away from MLPK. Having said that there are several three interesting possiblities in the Church Times this week (and if you think you know me well enough to guess them, then why not have a go?) and I feel a lot less stressed and intimidated by matters here.

On the one hand I've felt a lot happier of late for simply acknowledging there is a problem, but on the other I know that the tiredness and burnout won't go away. Plenty of people don't want to see us go, and I still worry somewhat that it'll all collapse in a heap if we do, but the longer-term issues remain unsolved.

All in all it means more prayer and discernment is needed. Last Bank Holiday (I think) I had the best time of praise and worship for a few years, even if it was just me, my guitar and the Spirit, but I still don't really know the way ahead. I have to plan here as if I have no intention of leaving, and plan my escape as if I have no intention of remaining! We asked God to make it clear, but I'm no way clear enough to phone the Bishop and say actually we got it all horribly wrong...

All a bit like the waiting between Ascension and Pentecost, perhaps - as long as we remember that the disciples didn't really have any clear idea of what they were waiting for either.....

Labels: Faith, Life, Ponderings

  ¶ 6:56 pm